It’s very rare now to walk into a nursery or garden centre and not be confronted with a bronzed woman lounging in some shallow form of modesty. They’re everywhere. At the front door; next to the counter; drawing your attention to the new annuals or gazing at you seductively from the lawn mower section. You would have to be wearing blinkers to miss them.
And, it appears that the retail industry is becoming far less discerning in what it offers and the days of little boys peeing and blushing pixies are but a distant memory. Some of the recent collections are up there with Formula 1 bimbo models or Hooter’s waitresses.
Stylized couples, life-size bronze sculptures and the modernization of formal classics appear to be the big sellers. But my question is, “Who buys these?” While they appear in their abundance at retail outlets I’m yet to see any that reside in local gardens.
Maybe those who purchase them place them in more secluded spots than the gardening shops? Perhaps the lawn-hugging lounge babe is couched across a creeper in the backyard rather than in the middle of their front garden turf? Who knows? They seem to disappear from the nurseries but never reappear in society.
Maybe some Victorian vigilante is knocking them off to rid society of its ills? Whatever the case, they can’t be ignored – they don’t seem to be going anywhere fast just taking up floorspace that could have been granted to more interesting plants.
So, would you (do you) have a nude sculpture in your garden? Would it offend the neighbours if you did? Would you care? Interested to hear your thoughts.